Ms W presents....

Who needs a little black book bursting with contacts when you're as stone-cold fabulous as Ms W? She doesn't wait for invites... she brings the party with her wherever she goes. And with a coterie of confidants from every letter-list in the alphabet (A to Z baby, we're all cool!) she has the beating heart of the island clenched in one damp fist and a bottle of cava gripped in the other. So if you want to know what's really happening. Who's hot, cool and about to boil over, stay tuned for all the adventures of Ms W presents...

A Night On The Town:

So, like, it's my fabulous friend's birthday and not just any old party will do. Oh no. We're talking this has to be THE MAX. Like him! Tee hee.

For starters: what to wear? I have a lot of clothes. Some of them are waaay nice. But obviously I can't throw on ANY OLD THING for an important occasion like this so I delve into the dulcet depths of my drawers to dig out the most divine dress ever. Totally prepped and glammed to the nines we pop the cork on a bottle of super-fine champagne (haha! only JOKING. Cava for us lovelies... when in Espanya. Anyway champagne is tres passe, no?)and drink a toast to the adventures ahead.

With the gorgeous birthday boy and his super-funny best friend we roll into town like the three amigos and throw-down at the nearest saloon. Luckily the locals are friendly and before we know it we're tipping back a tasty shot of herbas to say feliz cumplanos, or whatever it is.

Next we make our way to an uber-exclusive eaterie in the heart of Ibiza Town. I would totally tell you where it was but then it wouldn't be OUR LITTLE SECRET would it? There is roasted meat and toasted veg and whatever else but Ms W is far too giddy to bother with food (ordinary mortals may eat, I feast on the soul of the party!) But the red vino sinks nicely and before long Ms W is anxious to get them doggies moving and head on to the next destination.

After all, what's the point in staying in one place where there are SO MANY fabulous party spots to behold? The three amigos head for the old town where a succession of shots in a succesion of bars lends a nice fuzzy glow to the evening. In fact, if anyone knows how I got home, or what happened to that last 60€ can you just let me know? I mean, it's hard work being this amazing. I can't be expected to remember everything!

Highlight: Sinking a tequila at sunset.

Lowlight: Having to pay... don't they know who I am?

The gossip: Next time, I'm going to take a man to carry my money for me. Cuter and more reliable than a wallet.